If you have not done so already, hire an attorney. If you have one, you probably have been asked to prepare a financial statement, listing your income and expenses, as well as what you own (assets) and what you owe (liabilities). You will need access to the family records to complete your financial statements, whether they consist of monthly paper statements or online access. Make sure that you get this access as soon as possible (duplicate statements or online access) and follow your attorney’s advice regarding spending assets, closing accounts or opening new credit in your own name. If you are past this point in your divorce process, then you need to develop your own billpaying and record-keeping system. Try to use one bank account and one credit card to make expense tracking easier. You will also need to set up a permanent file for permanent records like birth certificates, passports, etc. Make sure you get copies of, or access to, any records or documents that can have an effect on your tax situation. Set up an annual tax file to put anything you think might be a tax deduction for you. Also, records relating to the cost of jointly owned property or property transferred to you in connection with the divorce are essential. You will need to establish cost when these assets are eventually sold. And, of course, all documents relating to the divorce or separation itself should be retained for tax (and other legal) purposes. You will need to do some tax planning with your CPA to change with withholdings depending on your new filing status, alimony paid or received, house deductions, who claims the children, etc. You will also need guidance on tax implications of the possible sale of the house and how to best handle IRA or 401(k) transfers. Make sure your will and your beneficiary designations are updated. If you will be moving, file a Form 8822 change of address form with IRS so you will receive any notices or correspondence from IRS promptly.

The financial issues during a divorce are often very complicated. You should keep in mind that you need to focus on not only your immediate short-term needs, but also your long-term financial security. Work with your attorney and a Certified Financial Planner professional to help you navigate through this maze. Some of the top things to consider include determining: what your individual basic living needs are on a monthly basis; whether or not to sell your house; what is a true and equitable split of your joint assets; the true value of each of your assets today as well as their potential in the future; the true value of defined benefit or pension plans; how and when a Qualified Domestic Relations Order is structured; if you are eligible to access retirement assets before age 59, without penalty, alimony and child support payments; and responsibility for debts outside of your home such as credit cards and car loans. Once the settlement is complete it would be wise to have your Certified Financial Planner professional build a comprehensive financial plan for you that incorporates cash flow, investments, retirement planning, estate planning, insurance needs and debt so that you have a blueprint for your financial future.

First off, you want to make sure that you are aware of all the family assets. Make sure that you know where all your and your spouse’s IRA’s, 401(k)s and other investment accounts are located and what they are worth. Make sure you also understand if your spouse has a pension and the estimated amounts. Your attorney will need to know all these amounts so that they can make sure that you get what you are entitled to receive. After your divorce is final, you will also want to make sure and update your beneficiaries on those retirement accounts as well as on any life insurance that you may have. These are not automatically changed, and you can unintentionally leave money to your ex-spouse if you do not update them. If you have children, you may also want to make sure that you have enough life insurance to provide for them in the event of your premature death. You will also want to update your will and powers of attorney to reflect the change. Make sure that if you had any joint credit cards that you have your ex-spouse removed from those accounts so that they cannot continue to charge on them. Divorce is enough stress on you, the last thing you want is to have your ex run your charge cards up for you to pay!

Sorry to hear that. I’m sure the basic things have probably already come to mind: 1. Try to work things out with your spouse and save your marriage if at all possible. 2. Remain as calm and civil as possible. 3. Be fair to yourself and your spouse (i.e., don’t let anyone be taken advantage of or manipulated by each other or their advisers). 4. Try to streamline things once you reach an agreement to help prevent unnecessary legal and emotional costs. Of course there are references out there to help during these difficult times. One example that comes to mind is a book called “When the Vow Breaks,” by Joseph Kniskern. If things don’t work out in the end and you find yourself flying solo, remember to create a budget first and foremost, and keep a firm handle on income, expenses, savings, emergency money, etc. Here’s to better times.